Wakanda Design Group: Comic Book Resources!
North Hollywood...
Jonah: "This is BOOLSHET... You are a fictional character this is virtually impossible!"
The offices were silent as staff members pondered the scene that played before their very eyes in total disbelief.
For years Jonah had warded off TROLLS, Haters and all manner of ilk that invaded the hallowed halls of the largest comic book based website but what was happening here defied logic.
Across his desk he protested in full James "Jonah" Jameson mode to no avail as the dark figure that towered over him stood staring through a black mask flanked on each side by what had to be the hottest set of women like ever.
Jonah: "I mean... How does something like this even happen in the real world?"
Black Panther: "It is simple math Wakanda Design Group has annexed Comic Book Resources making this operation a subsidiary of..."
Jonah: "I get that part but you are a fictional character... How can you even exist in the here and now?"
Black Panther: "I have contingency plans for every situation including coming off the illustrated panel when the national security of my sovereign country is threatened!"
Jonah: "So does Batman but you don't see him in here alive and well claiming ownership of a company I built!"
Black Panther: "Wayne Enterprises is focused more on Gotham City than international politics."
Jonah: "Are you listening to yourself what kind of Plot Induced Stupidity is this?"
Black Panther: "I realize that this is an awkward and unexpected event but if you check the paperwork you will see that everything is in order."
Jonah looks at the paperwork checking for any possible errors or plot loopholes to squeeze out of this dilemma and sighs deeply.
Jonah: "Okay this is authentic... What happens to me and my people?"
Black Panther: "They will all keep their jobs but..."
Jonah: "Here it comes..."
Black Panther: "You will reboot the entire forum and erase all evidence of it's past existence."
Jonah: "WTF!!!"
Black Panther: "I am searching for someone and need to draw him out from his TROLL hiding place."
Jonah: "And who might this TROLL be?"
Black Panther: "That is classified."
Jonah: "You do realize that such a drastic move could have a negative impact on business."
Black Panther: "Wakanda Design Group will compensate for any lost revenue."
Jonah: "Of course... I mean what else is new right? I'll have to notify over 100,000 members that..."
Black Panther: "NO! It is best to lead by surprise and I want emotions on edge for this particular event."
Jonah: "You do know that this TROLL could refuse to sign up again and ruin your entire search."
Black Panther: "I have detailed files on the psyche of internet TROLLS... If he is out there he will be compelled to return and reveal himself."
Jonah: "You have this all figured out huh."
Black Panther: "And for your troubles an advance on your new salary."
The Black Panther hands Jonah a check with the stamped symbol of Wakanda making it look really really official and authorized... I mean really official.
Jonah: "OH SNAP!!! That's a lot of zeroes... DAAAAAAAYUM!!! I'm pulling that plug right now and buying a private jet, a Ferrari and a yacht!"
Jonah ecstatically leaps out of his chair and hops over to the main circuit breaker and starts yanking exaggeratedly huge electric cords out of their designated sockets sending wild electrical bolts dancing all over... Let's just say it looked cinematically cool in a Dr. Frankenstein way so you had to be there to see it!
ZZZZZZsst... Spark... Bang... Boom... and stuff!
Anyway...
As the lights went out on CBR the Black Panther smiled coolly beneath his mask and departed swiftly with his two super model looking bodyguards following closely behind him.
Black Panther: "A pleasure doing business with you Jonah!"
Jonah: "Heck yeah... Making it rain baby all day every day!"
Jonah hops up on his desk and starts throwing single dollar bills to his staff as they try to sort out what just happened.
