Originally Posted by
Dante Milton
I am so sick of calls for characters to have incidental queerness, to "just happen to be gay". It's an identity, not a hobby, not something to be ignored or discarded when convenient. It is a community and a culture. We live in a dominant culture of heterosexuality and they may be "accepting" at times, but they will never let us forget for one second that we are different, that we are other. And we are, but that doesn't make us less than. That isn't really the kind of thing you can pretend doesn't have any effect on your life, in pretty much every aspect. Bobby's sexuality doesn't have to be mentioned explicitly at all times, and it definitely hasn't been, but the character doesn't stop being gay when it isn't mentioned and, contextually, that has meaning. When the straights call for a character to just happen to be gay what it feels like they are saying is that they are fine with a character being gay as long as they don't have to see the reality of that life, as long as they aren't made uncomfortable by the truth of it. When other queer people call for it, what it feels like is them saying they are more concerned for respectability politics, for playing the role of the good gay, for not offending the delicate sensibilities of straight people, than they are about accurately depicting our community. Later for that.