Originally Posted by
Prof. Warren
The fact that Peter has a friendship and relationship with Tony is not to the diminishment of Peter or means that he's wholly dependent on Tony.
Yes, he takes the suits that Tony builds for him. Just like Peter in the comics took the Iron Spider suit.
But he is not dependent on the suits Tony gives him. He uses them and uses Stark tech to make a new suit in FFH because, well, why not?
They are, after all, pretty cool.
And while Tony is his gateway to the Avengers, who else would be that entry point? It's not like he has Black Widow on speed dial.
It has to be remembered that Tony initially came to Peter. Peter didn't come to Tony begging to be involved in bigger hero matters. Tony came to Peter because Peter was already out there being Spider-Man.
And Peter wants to be involved with The Avengers in Homecoming because he wants to do the most good and make a difference. Not just to impress Tony. His reasons for wanting to do more are altruistic, not selfish. He thinks that just doing his thing in Queens is small potatoes compared with what Tony and the Avengers do.
But he ultimately turns down Tony's invitation to join the team because he finally realizes that you don't have to save the world to be a hero, you can just be a Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man and make a difference. Yes, he gets involved in Avengers business in IW/EG but in the comics, Spidey regularly gets roped into bigger things as well. You can't be a friendly neighborhood Spider-Man if there's no neighborhood left to protect.
And he doesn't "follow Tony around through IW" - he's in freaking space with him, where else is he supposed to go?
Honestly, the hang-up some fans have towards Tony and Peter's relationship in the MCU is ridiculous.
If you're at the point where you complain that a kid is crying too much because someone he cares about died in front of him, what is there to say?
I'm sure if he were completely stoic about it, there'd be something to complain about there, too.
How often, when someone close to someone dies, is there no grieving process and no further mention of that person?
Never is how often.
It's completely natural that FFH would deal with the fallout from Tony's death.
And when people complain "but, you know, that's not how it is in the comics!", for the umpteenth time THIS ISN'T THE COMICS!!!!
The MCU is its own continuity. You would think that in a time where the Spider-Verse is a thing that it would be easy for fans to recognize that it's ok for many different interpretations of Spidey to co-exist. The MCU Spidey isn't just like the 616 Spidey. Isn't meant to be. So before anyone says "but Peter and Tony don't have that kind of relationship in the comics", just realize that the movies are not the comics.
There are, of course, precedents in the comics for the MCU relationship, with Civil War and also in the Ultimate Universe where Peter is shown to idolize Tony but the MCU is telling its own story. And much of the way that story has been shaped is attributable to real world circumstance. Marvel doesn't own the rights to Spider-Man. Because of that, he couldn't be included at the start of MCU and his continued participation, after jumping in midstream, can't be taken for granted. So he has to be woven into this larger, ongoing tapestry in a much different way than Marvel handles the characters that are firmly under their own roof.
Now, back when making their prospective deal with Sony, Marvel could have said that, because they don't have full control of the character, that they're just going to opt not to include him at all. Marvel could have taken the stance that without that ownership no deal is worth it because they want to fully control every aspect of the character and only want to tell Spider-Man stories that involve no compromise on their part. They could do that, sure, but that would be awfully dumb, no?
The bottom line is that Feige and everyone involved understand that it's far better to have whatever fun they can have with Spider-Man in the MCU than to be completely rigid about it and have no fun at all. Spider-Man undergoes changes in every outside media adaptation. The MCU Spider-Man is no different. Once you accept that and understand that this is not meant to be "definitive" but just fun, it's much easier to enjoy it on its own terms.