Thanos vs Darkseid with a twist or two

[Postmania]

Thanos faces off against Darkseid in a series of largely improbable contests. They get about 15 minutes of prep time for each category

1) Youtube Makeup Tutorial: They have to create a video for youtube in which they demonstrate makeup techniques on themselves. Whoever gains the most followers/views wins
2) Marksmanship: They are both given an air rifle and have to hit targets. Who would be most successful?
3) Poker: They both have to take part in the World Poker series. Who makes it further?
4) Restauraunteur: They both have to manage and run a restaurant. Who closes down last? Alternatively, who gets the most customers?
5) Director: They have to direct a movie. Let's say they don't bankrupt themselves/scare off producers and their product is going to the silver screen no matter what. Who's movie is more successful? Who makes an actually better movie?
6) Eating contest: They have to do the old hot dog eating contest. Who stacks up the most dogs?
7) Dance: They have to both do their best version of the dance The Twist. Who gains the most acclaim from a panel of judges?

[Beadle]

1) Youtube Makeup Tutorial: They have to create a video for youtube in which they demonstrate makeup techniques on themselves. Whoever gains the most followers/views wins

Darkseid has a whole planet of people to set-up YouTube accounts and subscribe to his channel. I mean do you really think YouTube check what planet their users are on?

2) Marksmanship: They are both given an air rifle and have to hit targets. Who would be most successful?

Thanos. Darkseid relies heavily on a weapon that hits regardless.

3) Poker: They both have to take part in the World Poker series. Who makes it further?

Thanos. He feels more strategic, and would just sit there with a ****-eating grin, irritating Darkseid into making a mistake.

4) Restauraunteur: They both have to manage and run a restaurant. Who closes down last? Alternatively, who gets the most customers?

Again, Darkseid has an endless stream of customers from Apokolips.

5) Director: They have to direct a movie. Let's say they don't bankrupt themselves/scare off producers and their product is going to the silver screen no matter what. Who's movie is more successful? Who makes an actually better movie?

Same problem for Thanos. Darkseid has the definitive captive audience.

6) Eating contest: They have to do the old hot dog eating contest. Who stacks up the most dogs?

Thanos, as an Eternal, has complete control over his body structure. I feel like that might help.

7) Dance: They have to both do their best version of the dance The Twist. Who gains the most acclaim from a panel of judges?

I feel like Thanos has more flexibility and aerobic fitness, as he tends to get his hands dirty more.

So overall 4-3 to Thanos.

[big_adventure]

1) Youtube Makeup Tutorial: They have to create a video for youtube in which they demonstrate makeup techniques on themselves. Whoever gains the most followers/views wins - THANOS is better with prep and tools. Darkseid depends much more on his personal powers and his allies/servants abilities. At least, that's my impression.

2) Marksmanship: They are both given an air rifle and have to hit targets. Who would be most successful? THANOS probably. Darkseid, when he shoots something, uses autohoming omega beams. I could see him just shoot the rifle off to the side and expect the pellet to turn and track the target, then get crazy angry when that doesn't work.

3) Poker: They both have to take part in the World Poker series. Who makes it further? Thanos has better TP feats, so him? Telepathy would be a autowin.

4) Restauraunteur: They both have to manage and run a restaurant. Who closes down last? Alternatively, who gets the most customers? Ehhhh... DARKSEID as Thanos is somewhat more likely to kill his own customers.

5) Director: They have to direct a movie. Let's say they don't bankrupt themselves/scare off producers and their product is going to the silver screen no matter what. Who's movie is more successful? Who makes an actually better movie? Flip a coin. Neither seem like "entertaining others" is top of the bucket list.

6) Eating contest: They have to do the old hot dog eating contest. Who stacks up the most dogs? DARKSEID if we go by the sometimes-presented thing that he's really super gigantic and that boom tubes manage size equilibrium. If he's bigger, he should be able to eat more?

7) Dance: They have to both do their best version of the dance The Twist. Who gains the most acclaim from a panel of judges? THANOS because Darkseid falls down the stairs on the way to the stage and heads back to Mary Marvel's couch.

[Nik Hasta]

I feel like Darkseid would actually make a better director than Thanos. He's much more dramatic in his presentation and he's much more used to ruling an empire which does involve some aspect of logistical organisation and thinking big picture rather than Thanos who tends to be much more solitary.

Hmm...

Thanos would make some kind of weird mumblecore indie movie about how beautiful Death is and it would mostly star only the Black Order.

Darkseid makes some kind of ultra over the top part-biopic part-war film about his projected conquest of New Genesis and the war of light and dark and it has a cast of thousands of people. It might even be an opera. Darkseid would direct and would also be in it.

Like... Thanos makes You And Me And Everyone We Know meets Wings of Desire while Darkseid makes something like Chronicles of Riddick meets Gormenghast

Both aren't good but I think Darkseid would be more entertainingly bad.

[Alan2099]

4) Restauraunteur: They both have to manage and run a restaurant. Who closes down last? Alternatively, who gets the most customers?

Only one of the two has experience.

7) Dance: They have to both do their best version of the dance The Twist. Who gains the most acclaim from a panel of judges?

Only one of the two has shown any dancing skills.

[Captain Morgan]

Darkseid actually used the internet and a watered down anti life equation to take over half the Earth during Final Crisis. And as the duck pointed out he already has one planet locked in. I'd have to assume he wins anything Youtube or social media based, and probably the restaurant thing too.

[Shellhead]

7.) Darkseid doesn't have any feats for swiveling his torso, so I don't believe that he is capable of performing the Twist.