How dare you bring reasoned discourse into a gripe thread
I'll second a few of your thoughts enthusiastically:
- Few people are all that scared by deep continuity, as long as it actually, y'know, exists. Before the Crisis, DC's continuity wasn't particularly daunting. It was deep, and had some silly stuff in the past that could probably be ignored (looking at you, Wonder Tot), but it wasn't what anyone would call befuddling. And the post-Crisis DCU wasn't all that difficult to grok either, even though it started to fray at the edges a bit when the whole "Superboy-Prime punches continuity" thing came into play. On the other hand, when continuity doesn't appear to exist, or is only half-formed, it can push people away, as exhibited at times by ad hoc nature of post-Flashpoint continuity.
- In the end, though, quality comics will win the day. One of the reasons that people rolled with the changes of Crisis was that a) 90% of the current books that they were enjoying continued on their merry way without a care in the world, and b) The heavily rebooted books (Superman, Wonder Woman) got studly A-List creators attached to them (Byrne, Perez, Ordway, etc.). The New 52 got some high-level talent on their rebooted books (which, lo and behold, were some of the books that got the most praise), but they also threw three titles to Rob freakin' Liefeld. If you were enjoying a pre-Flashpoint book only to have it cancelled so that a line-wide reboot can bring on a Rob Liefeld Hawkman series, you might get a bit miffed.
- Your final point, about the limits, is one that needs to be explored further. In the post-Crisis universe, there were a few undeniable limits placed on creators: Stories about the multiverse were gone, the Golden Age trinity (plus a few) were no longer available (which no doubt drove poor Roy Thomas insane), and a few other characters had been wiped from history (notably Supergirl). But aside from that, creators were pretty darned free to write whatever stories they wanted to, building up a universe that was still about 90% the same as it was before the Crisis. On top of that, they had new, multigenerational bonds to explore now that Earth-2 had been "added" to the history of Earth-1. It was if a big new canvas had been added.
Post-Flashpoint, however, had removed a LOT of the toys. All of the golden age characters were gone. The Titans history was gone. Characters (weirdly) were no longer allowed to be married. There *was* a blank canvas available to scribble *new* histories for these characters, but nothing could reference past events, 'cause they, by and large, no longer existed. It must have been very frustrating. Especially since, as has been detailed elsewhere, they were getting mixed signals from their editors about what they could and could not do.
It occurs to me that this dead horse has been beaten into its component quarks by now.