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  1. #1

    Default You get replace by a turkey.

    one day a secret government experiment turns you into a turkey and replaces you with a turkey who becomes you. how to you respond?
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  2. #2
    Mighty Member Shai-Hulud's Avatar
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    This is not a problem for me, as I am a disciple of the Ovoid mind transfer technique. I simply shift back into my human body.

  3. #3
    Astonishing Member
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    I imagine my body is hospitalized/institutionalized, as I'm judged to be having some sort of mental break.

    By contrast, my mind must act quickly. I know soon the winter months will be upon us, and the promise of my slaughter for the Day of Thanks is imminent. I must escape. But how? My true body was a paragon of power, speed, and dexterity. The skills I had, the might I mustered....

    I'm not even sure how I was captured. But it scarcely matters. This body is not that body.

    This body is plump, and juicy, and not attuned for the rigors of survival and war.

    But, even in another body, my mind is as sharp as an obsidian blade, my insights as penetrating as that one plant that caused a horse to leap to it's death in Australia. I think it was Australia. I don't know. Look it up yourself.

    I will make the agency that did this to me, rue the day that they inconvenienced me. The horrors my beak will visit upon to them. Upon to their being. Upon parts of their being. Precious things, irreplaceable things shall be ripped asunder, never to be made whole again.

    They will long for death, and visit it upon themselves.

    I will visit this horror upon all who oppose me. Until finally, one of these people, aware of the atrocities I have committed, breaks and restores my mind and body to it's correct union.

    "But Miburo?" You ask, "How do you know that this person will honor their agreement?"

    Simple. Horror and fear break even the most rational of minds. It will not occur to him to betray me. He will dance to my warbling tune, as if I was a turkified pied piper.

    When I am restored, I honor my agreement and allow him to live.

    Sadly, the turkey--Having now found it's body has an unholy desire to gorge itself on the blood of the wicked--attacks the man and ravages his essence, despite my feeble protestations.

    I keep the turkey as my dear companion, and swear off turkey meat.

  4. #4
    Ultimate Member Phoenixx9's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miburo View Post

    I keep the turkey as my dear companion, and swear off turkey meat.
    Ah, but what about Chicken, his dear cousin? Have you sworn off it as well?

    If not, a Chicken Delight may visit you one night, scare you with fright, and visit upon you a blight, which is not slight, with its unholy beak and claws of might!
    [Quote Originally Posted by Thor-El 10-15-2020 12:32 PM]

    "Jason Aaron should know there is already a winner of the Phoenix Force and his name is Phoenixx9."


    Like a Red Dragon, The Phoenix shall Soar in 2024!

  5. #5
    E-Liter3K Scoped Headshot The MunchKING's Avatar
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    Dang it! Ribbon was supposed to prevent this! Stupid "plot points". Guess I got to go find a Cleric who can cast "remove Curse", or failing that a Wizard who can cast True Polymorph.
    The MunchKING is Back! And he is AWSOME!

  6. #6
    She/Her Cthulhu_of_R'lyeh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Miburo View Post
    I imagine my body is hospitalized/institutionalized, as I'm judged to be having some sort of mental break.

    By contrast, my mind must act quickly. I know soon the winter months will be upon us, and the promise of my slaughter for the Day of Thanks is imminent. I must escape. But how? My true body was a paragon of power, speed, and dexterity. The skills I had, the might I mustered....

    I'm not even sure how I was captured. But it scarcely matters. This body is not that body.

    This body is plump, and juicy, and not attuned for the rigors of survival and war.

    But, even in another body, my mind is as sharp as an obsidian blade, my insights as penetrating as that one plant that caused a horse to leap to it's death in Australia. I think it was Australia. I don't know. Look it up yourself.

    I will make the agency that did this to me, rue the day that they inconvenienced me. The horrors my beak will visit upon to them. Upon to their being. Upon parts of their being. Precious things, irreplaceable things shall be ripped asunder, never to be made whole again.

    They will long for death, and visit it upon themselves.

    I will visit this horror upon all who oppose me. Until finally, one of these people, aware of the atrocities I have committed, breaks and restores my mind and body to it's correct union.

    "But Miburo?" You ask, "How do you know that this person will honor their agreement?"

    Simple. Horror and fear break even the most rational of minds. It will not occur to him to betray me. He will dance to my warbling tune, as if I was a turkified pied piper.

    When I am restored, I honor my agreement and allow him to live.

    Sadly, the turkey--Having now found it's body has an unholy desire to gorge itself on the blood of the wicked--attacks the man and ravages his essence, despite my feeble protestations.

    I keep the turkey as my dear companion, and swear off turkey meat.
    We know full well you and the turkey are barely different.

    Sleep. Eat. Sleep. Occasionally gobble and kick all **** out of the neighbors.

    This change does little.
    Yeah, but if you... man, we're getting into weird analogy territory, like if you disintegrated Superman's arms he wouldn't be able to go "fool! Little did you know that my arms and I are one and can be remade from me!" and will his arms back into being from pure nothingness. - Pendaran

    Arx Inosaan

  7. #7
    Astonishing Member Shellhead's Avatar
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    Depending on when this happens, I might be okay. If at home, it's awkward because my cat will be terrified and I will be trapped inside a suburban home with no opposing thumb to open doors. If I am at work, it's great because I work at a cricket farm. I wait until the door is left open for a while and stroll outside to join the local flock of wild turkeys that feeds upon the escaped crickets.

  8. #8
    Astonishing Member Godzilla2099's Avatar
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    Anybody here watch Super Sentai? Specifically Shinkenger Season.

    One episode Genta's soul was switched into a piece of sushi that was about to be eaten by a cat. Although he was saved before the cat ate it, Genta became fearful of sushi

    That is probably what will happen to me if I had to live the life of a turkey with farmers or whatever else wanting to make me into their dinner.

  9. #9
    Extraordinary Member Hiromi's Avatar
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    forget me, how does the Turkey respond when it opens the fridge and is confronted by ground turkey and turkey sausage

  10. #10

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    Got this idea from the turkey episode of Rick and Morty.
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  11. #11
    Prince of Duckness Beadle's Avatar
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    I suspect the turkey would succeed somewhat better at my life than I do. At least it wouldn’t overthink stuff.

  12. #12
    She/Her Cthulhu_of_R'lyeh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hiromi View Post
    forget me, how does the Turkey respond when it opens the fridge and is confronted by ground turkey and turkey sausage
    Depends on whether or not it's a wild turkey.

    If it's a domestic turkey the do, from time to time, cannibalize each other.
    Yeah, but if you... man, we're getting into weird analogy territory, like if you disintegrated Superman's arms he wouldn't be able to go "fool! Little did you know that my arms and I are one and can be remade from me!" and will his arms back into being from pure nothingness. - Pendaran

    Arx Inosaan

  13. #13
    JUST DO IT?!?! Postmania's Avatar
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    How do I taste
    “The master has failed more times than the beginner has even tried.”
    -Stephen McCranie

  14. #14
    Prince of Duckness Beadle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Postmania View Post
    How do I taste
    Through tastebuds on your tongue.

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