What's wrong with "High Pockets" (or Shell Head or Wing Head or the other nicknames)? It's pretty funny. Stan Lee was basically a comedy writer and a lot of his dialogue is comedy dialogue. (A lot of the more comedic stuff, like Spider-Man's wisecracks and the Thing's dialogue, is still written more or less the way Lee wrote it.) It's the more "serious" dialogue that has changed the most over time to being a little more subtle.
That's because in the Golden Age and a lot of the Silver Age DC, super hero comics were written incredibly compressed. Jim Shooter once explained the '60s writing process at DC and said every panel had to be a scene in itself - the editors didn't think kids would sit still for a scene that went on too long. So every couple of panels, we would switch to a new action or a new scene, and the narration would have to tell us where we were or what was happening, because that one panel was supposed to carry an entire scene's worth of information. If you look at humor comics from the same period (like Donald Duck or Archie) there are many fewer captions because the scenes play out long enough for the artist to show what's going on.
This was one of the big changes Marvel made in the '60s, that they slowly started to "decompress" super hero comics and have longer scenes, dialogue and action. You'll notice as the '60s go on, Stan Lee's writing has fewer captions; in a lot of the Spider-Man stories with Romita, he uses captions to tell us what happened last issue or where we are, but not usually to tell us what's happening.
I think people are sometimes unfair to captions like they're always redundant, when a lot of times if you take them out, you may lose some extra information they give you. The cool thing about a well-done caption is that it can create the illusion that we see more in the panel than we actually see, or that we get a sense of several things happening at once. Some of the narration in Claremont is like that. And then again some of it would probably just be replaced today by a caption telling us the character's name. That's OK too.