Predators vs GI Joe, Cobra

[Hypestyle]

so if a crew of Yautja were drawn to one of the many military battles of GI Joe vs Cobra, and let's say it was a jungle environment like the first movie, I wonder how long members of the Joe team and the Cobra forces would last?

Who would be the top 5 members of each faction to last the longest before finally having a showdown with the Predator?

For sake of argument, keep the human weaponry to the comics continuity, not the 80s era cartoon shows (e.g., everybody has a laser blaster).

[Alan2099]

How big of a battle is this? Both the Joes and Cobra have hundreds of members, and tanks, and jets, and all sorts of other crazy vehicles.

The could the Predator without even realizing it was there.

[The MunchKING]

The could the Predator without even realizing it was there.

It's G.I. JOE. They can't kill anyone. I don't think COBRA ever got away with it either, but being villains they may have got some off-screen kills I don't remember.


That said their plot-armor was pretty ridiculous so I don't know if the Predators would manage to kill any of them either.

[LordMikel]

Shipwreck wins. The parrot would be viewed as a non combatant and not worthwhile for the predators to kill, so he'd help Shipwreck to stay alive.

Although it is Shipwreck, so possibly Beachhead.

For Cobra side. I'm going with Baroness for the win.

[Muadib]

Isnt this basically a case of "How many Predators do Snake Eyes, Scarlett, Storm Shadow, Jinx, Zartan and Billy merk before they go down? Firefly is a Koga trained iirc. Add him to the pile.

I mean Snake Eyes and Storm Shadow have some pretty CBPH feats and some outright bullet dodging in their comics continuities. Their katanas cut thru steel, weeaboo myth style. They can infallibly detect when someone is watching them, and ghost as well as Batman.

They would undoubtedly be the last on either side and then reluctantly team up. Add some "Arashikage Mindset" hypnosis to the mix and they will not go down until neckdeep in Yautja corpses.

(Why yes i am a GI JOE fan, what gave it away?)

[Hypestyle]

so, would Serpentor actually last long enough for a one-on-one showdown? I'm not sure.
I think Stalker and Spirit could last longer than most people assume.

[The MunchKING]

Firefly is a Koga trained iirc.

Really? What kind of Poison Pokémon does he like?

I always like Psychic types, so I'll probably run through his team.

[Muadib]

so, would Serpentor actually last long enough for a one-on-one showdown? I'm not sure.
I think Stalker and Spirit could last longer than most people assume.

All the named characters on both sides are basicallt 80's actions movie protagonists. GI JOE is the Hasbro verse Delta Force equivalent iirc. Most of them will take t least one Yautja each and possibly more.

It's just that the Ninja crowd in the comics are a step above even 1980's action hero, basically 1 man armies whose only in setting competition are each other and people wielding super tech like power armour, or full borg ninja masters. Even then its a crap shoot for the non ninjas.

The Yautja are gonna have to bring out the Big Guns for Storm Shadow and Snake Eyes especially.

[Jcogginsa]

All the named characters on both sides are basicallt 80's actions movie protagonists. GI JOE is the Hasbro verse Delta Force equivalent iirc. Most of them will take t least one Yautja each and possibly more.

Isn't the first Predator movie about the Predator hunting a whole team of 80s Action heroes

[Godzilla2099]

Isn't the first Predator movie about the Predator hunting a whole team of 80s Action heroes

I was literally thinking the same thing:

My choices for dealing with the Predator

Spirit: Only when Dutch fought it like a Hunter instead of a Soldier did he manage to turn the tides around. However, Dutch had a similar member on his team (Billy) and unfortunately that didn't end well.
Recondo: Jungle Specialist. Primary is infantry and secondary is intelligence gathering
Snake Eyes: Ninja Commando that is pretty much a Jack of all Trades
Storm Shadow: Ninja for stealth
Serpentor: My pick if I had to deal with a Predator one on one.

[Muadib]

Isn't the first Predator movie about the Predator hunting a whole team of 80s Action heroes

Yes, and thats why i dont include any of the regulars in the Ninja All Star Squad i project will make it to the final battle. The Joes and named Cobras are Action Heroes, the Ninjas on both sides are a large step above.

However if out of shape near retirement but still a badass Danny Glover can take a Predator, i would definitely put at least 1 Predator a piece for the non ninja hardcases on both sides.

Except for Sgt Slaughter. The Yautja will worship as an avatar of their gods.

[Thezmage]

I think the Yautja's have been hit pretty hard by Nerfs since the first movie. Weaknesses now include autistic kids and Archie Andrews.

Any Joe sufficiently skilled in infiltration and using the environment should work. The Joes' main weakness is knowing their enemy has thermo vision and being able to tell that the enemy can become invisible, but between the former being something in the real world and the latter being pretty analogous to dealing with Zartan or Storm Shadow

Both Lifeline and Doc are likely to survive, as neither one is going to grab a weapon. although Lifeline might throw himself in front of the wrong attack to save somebody else.

Recondo and Outback could likely take them down in any sort of jungle or forest environment.

Snake Eyes or Storm Shadow have more than enough ninja tricks to fool the Yautja's technology. Same should go for Scarlett, Jinx, and any other Arashikage-trained person.

Stalker in the comics is basically Dutch IMO.

Sgt Slaughter is literally Hercules.

Zartan has a lot of advantages, but I think his overconfidence is going to get him killed. His siblings will then nope out of there.

Cobra Commander is going to retreat quite early. I think Destro is going to get killed. Baroness will retreat, her sense of self-preservation is just too high.

[Cleric of Hell’s Brigade]

Sgt. Slaughter outlasts them all.