Yeah, the dialog over all was really bad. That just doesn't sound like Superman. If it was Supergirl saying that to Powergirl maybe it would work...but it just felt really weird coming out of Superman's mouth.
I was pretty pumped for this as I thought Venditti's Hawkman did a fantastic job of making the Hawk's history simpler so I was looking forward to seeing someone build on that but this was just a convoluted mess.