Lets be honest we all have at times have had that urge. That urge around people to just unleash THE WIND. To let loose with an epic fart and not care. But a lot of us are civillized people who won't decide to pass gas in front of people. We walk off and get alone to let loose with it.

Of course there are those of us evil folks who decide , if we have to fart ...then its gonna happen. But we will unleash a SILENT BUT DEADLY one that will total everyone in the surrounding areas. Worse than normal smoke or acid rain , a silent but deadly fart has little mercy and is out to destroy everyone in its path !

Now some of you will question , what is a silent but deadly fart ? Well as the movie Liar , Liar shows us...its this....





Unlike this though , he who delivers the Silent but Deadly , will often never reveal their dastardly deed. Leaving a lot of folks to SUFFER. Often we suspect who delivered it and think , could so n so have delivered that unto us ? As the elevator scene shows us , the human suffering we take from the Silent but Deadly is just tragic.


Then there is the Loud & Proud. That one is were damn happy to fart and let off to show we live in America and only real Americans who love freedom every day can just break loose with loud EPIC farts. Not caring if people say a word because gosh darn it....soldiers gave us this right to break wind in front of anyone.




One of the greatest examples of the Loud & Proud is Andre the Giant. Its came out a few years ago that during production of A Princess Bride , Andre stopped and suddenly ..UNLEASHED A 16 SECOND FART in front of everyone. It stunned everyone not for just being Loud & Proud , its the duration that did it.

"You ok Andre ?" director Rob Reiner asked.

"I am now boss." - Andre .


Andre was at ease to do this. A fact he was ok with unleashing the wind for everyone to hear. I admit I'm not as proud as Andre to do it so big in public . So alone I let loose with a symphony for the Gods with my behind !

I have one friend who will scheme to do silent but deadly's too. He plots and reveals later how he got us all. His evil knows no bounds.

In all , what are you ?