2014 X-Book Awards- The Results

[worstblogever]

2014 X-Books Awards as Voted by the X-Forum- RESULTS!


Here was the original thread with the nominees, that a lot of folks voted in, and there some votes that came in via Private Message.

The plan, as it stands, is I’m going to go ahead and post a few of these up at a time, over the next few days, and the thread is more than open to discussion of the results, including both the X-Book Award winners, and the X-Razzie categories that are available.

I strongly encourage, though, congratulations for the creators who work on the characters and titles that win, and those that win in the best writer and best artist category, when the time comes. With any luck, some of them may be willing to drop in and thank those who voted for them, and probably tease that we haven’t seen anything yet, with 2015 already well and under way.

Thank you again to all those who participated in the voting, and thanks to the creators, that have given us all something to vote for!

And… on with the rundown…

FINAL RESULTS:

1/19/2015
Best Onomatopoeia
Honorable Mention: KRAAKOOM!
Honorable Mention: KRAACK!
3rd Runner Up: PSINIKT!
2nd Runner-up: The Final "SNIKT!"
1st Runner-up: SPPAASSHH!
Winner: BAMF!

Best Quote
Honorable Mention: “I think I’m behaving quite well and I’d like one of you to acknowledge it.” -Wolverine
Honorable Mention: "When I was just a girl, I called myself goddess... and I lived in the sky. Sometimes I wonder why I ever left. I'm a mutant with the power to control the weather. Here's where I belong... every nerve connected with the wind, the clouds, the vapor." -Storm
3rd Runner Up: "And you disgust me, Hank McCoy." - The Watcher.
2nd Runner-up: "Dasvidaniya Bitches." – Magik.
1st Runner-up: “I’m the weapon.” -Teen Cyclops
Winner: "It means Scott Summers was Right!" - Beast

Most Bizarre Moment (Rouge Mort Trophy)
Honorable Mention: Hope’s Cyberspace Sexytime with Fantomex!
Honorable Mention: Ogun possesses Kitty and Tongue-Wrestles Wolverine!
3rd Runner Up: Xavier and Mystique Made a Baby
2nd Runner-up: The Mystery Villain Under the Dome is… Dark Beast? WTF?
1st Runner-up: Dazzler's Edgy Makeover
Winner: Exodus is working for S.H.I.E.L.D.?

Most Shocking Moment
Honorable Mention: Inverted Evan is Apocalypse!
Honorable Mention: Fantomex feeds Cable's corpse to sharks!
3rd Runner Up: Exodus gets "Worfed"!
2nd Runner-up: Eva Bell's Future Family!
1st Runner-up: Lensherr Family Retcon!
Winner: Xavier and Mystique were Married!

Funniest Moment
Honorable Mention: Psylocke Censors Marrow
Honorable Mention: Emma Frost's Psychic Battle with Teen Jean
3rd Runner Up: Forgetmenot, the Phantom House Guest
2nd Runner-up: Beast Frets that "Cyclops was Right!"
1st Runner-up: Danger Hits on Everything
Winner: Emma Frost Reacts to the Xavier/Darkholme Marriage.

Best Fight/Battle
Honorable Mention: Polaris, Gambit, & Quicksilver vs. Danger
Honorable Mention: All New X-Factor vs. Sunfire & Longshot
3rd Runner Up: X-Force vs. MI:13
2nd Runner-up: New Charles Xavier School vs. Future Brotherhood- Round Two
1st Runner-up: Magneto & Uncanny Avengers vs. Red Skull, Ahab, & S-Men
Winner: X-Men & Hijack vs. Dark Beast & S.H.I.E.L.D.

Best Death:
Honorable Mention: Red Skull
Honorable Mention: Cable
3rd Runner Up: Amanda Sefton
2nd Runner-up: Dark Beast
1st Runner-up: Exodus
Winner: Wolverine

1/20/2015
Best Romance/Kiss: Storm & Wolverine
Honorable Mention: Teen Cyclops & Vileena
Honorable Mention: Fantomex & Dr. Nemesis
3rd Runner Up: Gambit & Polaris
2nd Runner-up: X-23 & Teen Angel
1st Runner-up: Kitty Pryde & Star-Lord
Winner:

Best Crossover
Honorable Mention: Original Sin
Honorable Mention: Revolutionary War
3rd Runner Up: AXIS
2nd Runner-up: No End in Sight
1st Runner-up: Death of Wolverine
Winner: The Trial of Jean Grey

Low Point of the Year
Honorable Mention: X-23 Dialogue by Bendis
Honorable Mention: Gladiator's Case against Teen Jean
3rd Runner Up: Exodus gets Smoked.
2nd Runner-up: Xavier and Mystique Revelations
1st Runner-up: AXIS
Winner: Eisenhardt Family Retcon

High Point of the Year
Honorable Mention: Gambit & Polaris... Will They or Won't They?
Honorable Mention: Storm's Got an Awesome Solo
3rd Runner Up: Bromo Superior
2nd Runner-up: Beast admits Cyclops was Right
1st Runner-up: Nightcrawler is Back from the Dead
Winner: Magneto being Brutally Awesome/Awesomely Brutal

Most Missed Character
Honorable Mention: Karma
Honorable Mention: Blink
3rd Runner Up: Pixie
2nd Runner-up: Multiple Man
1st Runner-up: Warpath
Winner: Dani Moonstar

Best Debut Character
Honorable Mention: Rico
Honorable Mention: Harrison Snow
3rd Runner Up: Creep/Flourish
2nd Runner-up: Briar Raleigh
1st Runner-up: Matthew Malloy
Winner: Forgetmenot

Breakthrough Character
Honorable Mention: Danger
Honorable Mention: Hijack
3rd Runner Up: Hellion
2nd Runner-up: Teen Cyclops
1st Runner-up: Magik
Winner: Tempus

1/21/2015
Best Guest Star in an X-Book
Honorable Mention: She-Hulk
Honorable Mention: Uatu the Watcher
3rd Runner Up: Alpha Flight
2nd Runner-up: Maria Hill
1st Runner-up: MI:13
Winner: Guardians of the Galaxy

Best Mutant Appearing Outside an X-book
Honorable Mention: Shadowcat
Honorable Mention: Namor
3rd Runner Up: Prodigy II
2nd Runner-up: Rogue
1st Runner-up: Sunspot
Winner: Cannonball

Least Favorite Villain(s)
Honorable Mention: Arkea
Honorable Mention: Phoenix Corporation
3rd Runner Up: Dark Beast
2nd Runner-up: The Future
1st Runner-up: Red Onslaught
Winner: Kade Kilgore & the Hellfire Club

Best Villain(s)
Honorable Mention: Gladiator
Honorable Mention: Raze
3rd Runner Up: Mystique
2nd Runner-up: Red Skull
1st Runner-up: S.H.I.E.L.D.
Winner: Fantomex

Least Favorite Hero
Honorable Mention: Quentin Quire
Honorable Mention: Cyclops
3rd Runner Up: Iceman
2nd Runner-up: Havok
1st Runner-up: Scarlet Witch
Winner: Beast

Best Hero
Honorable Mention: Psylocke
Honorable Mention: Magneto
3rd Runner Up: Cyclops
2nd Runner-up: Nightcrawler
1st Runner-up: Storm
Winner: Magik

1/22/2015
Least Favorite Cover
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Winner:

Best Cover
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Least Favorite One-Shot
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Best One-Shot
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Least Favorite Miniseries
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Best Miniseries
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1/23/2015
Least Favorite Story from a Single X-Title
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Best Story from a Single X-Title
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Least Favorite Ongoing
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Best Ongoing
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Best Artist
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Best Writer:
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[RLAAMJR.]

I'm so excited!

[Wind Rider]

Looking forward to the results.

[worstblogever]

ONOMATOPOIEA OF THE YEAR

The winner in 2013 was “POINK!” But can Goldballs hold onto the award this year?



Honorable Mention

KRAAKOOM! (5 points, 1 first place votes)

Ororo Munroe will put 1.21 gigawatts of power straight up suckas’ flux capacitor (and by flux capacitor, I mean their ***es), and she reminded us of exactly that right here.



Honorable Mention

KRAACK! (8 points, 1 first place votes)
Not a sound effect to announce the arrival of former Toronto Mayor Rob Ford, this instead was the audio during the beatdown given by Tempus to Morgan Le Fay.



Third runner-up

“PSINIKT!” (9 points, 2 first place votes)

This one might be the sound of Psylocke telekinetically creating her own version of Wolverine’s claws, but I feel like this also could be the name that Logan/Betsy shippers give the duo as a couple.

[worstblogever]

Second runner-up

“The Final SNIKT!” (10 points, 3 first place votes)

Back in 2010, Nightcrawler won for what was called “the final BAMF”, and now, a few years later, forum members have given a lesser nod to the last SNIKT Wolverine pulled off in “Death of Wolverine”. But let’s be real, X-23 and Daken are still running around to make sure it lingers on. Small comfort, at least.

First runner-up

“SPPAASSH!” (13 points, 3 first place votes)
Since “Schism”, Bobby Drake has been throwing shade Scott Summers’ way. Little petty insults, guilt trips, and attempts to show his old schoolmate/teammate that all is decidedly NOT forgiven between the two. During the reading of Professor Xavier’s Will… well, Cyclops apparently had enough of Iceman popping off and blasted him out of the mansion. The sound was music to fans of Slim’s ears.

And the 2014 award winner for what amounts to, “Best Sound Effect” is…


“BAMF!” (22 points, 7 first place votes)

Nightcrawler is back from the dead, and he’s been BAMFING in every MFING X-Men comic, practically. In his solo title? BAMF. In Amazing X-Men? BAMF. AXIS? BAMF. Just BAMF BAMF BAMF BAMF BAMF OH SWEET JESUS IT REEKS OF ROTTEN EGGS IN HERE DAMN YOU KURT.

Anyway, Nightcrawler’s custom sound effect takes home the title.

[worstblogever]

Honorable Mention

- Wolverine! (10 points, 2 first place votes)

He’s got a point. I mean, for once, Logan was being all civil and polite during the reading of Xavier’s will, and managing to not threaten to stab anyone in the face. Credit where it’s due, he was behaving quite well.


Honorable Mention

- Storm (10 points, 3 first place votes)

The first lines of Storm’s new series, written by Greg Pak didn’t just set the tone, they really told you everything you ever needed to know about Ororo Munroe, in a paragraph. So it’s not surprising to see Storm fans all give it a nod to get it an honorable mention in this write-in category.




Third runner-up

- The Watcher (11 points, 1 first place vote)

Uatu says what a great many X-Men fans around CBR have been saying about Hank McCoy the past several years. At least he didn’t point out the myriad of times that the Beast has committed genocide. (Seriously, he’s done it like 4 or 5 times now!)

[worstblogever]

Second Runner-up


– Magik (12 points, 3 first place votes)

In case you forgot, Ilyana Rasputin is Russian. And she’s also sassy as all get out. A previous “Best Quote” winner two years ago for “There are no snowflakes in Hell”, and placing last year for wanting to steal underwear and clog the toilets at Avengers mansion… Magik is quickly becoming one of the most quotable X-Men.


First Runner-up…

- Teen Cyclops! (12 points, 3 first place vote)

Teen Scott Summers went all James Bond after blasting a space pirate on his ***. Quipping after pwning someone? Why, I dare say Teen Scott might not be as hopeless a case as the original Cyclops was at that age.


And the 2014 award winner for the quote of the year is…


"It means Scott Summers was Right!" - Beast.
- Beast (24 points, 6 first place votes)

Impotent rage and the possibility of this being used in court at a later date made Hank McCoy’s outburst in Uncanny X-Men (vol. 3) this year a runaway winner in this category. Hopefully, Storm will get him to the vet for his shots soon enough.

[worstblogever]

MOST BIZARRE MOMENT OF THE YEAR (a.k.a. the Rouge Mort Trophy)
Last Year’s Winner was Shatterstar is his own grandfather?!? That’s… that’s just weird. Not since Fry became his own ancestor on Futurama has their been a time-travel paradox that’s nearly incestuous in nature. So what moment from 2014 made X-Fans go, “WTF?”


Honorable Mention

Hope’s Cyberspace Sexytime with Fantomex! (10 points, 2 first place votes)

All right, for some reason or another, Hope revealed that she was actually Meme to Fantomex via a cyperspace mind-link with his advanced brain, which she then stimulated the pleasure centers of in a way that made you feel like Le Pew was going to end up on a sex offenders’ list.

And that still wasn’t the creepiest thing to get votes in the Rouge Mort Award category.

Honorable Mention

Ogun possesses Kitty and Tongue-Wrestles Wolverine! (10 points, 2 first place votes)

Ogun is creepy as ****. He just possessed Kitty Pryde for the soul purpose of trying to make her seduce Wolverine because it would skeeve the both of them out, simultaneously. Just… mind control/possession can get weird/pervy enough as it is, but this scene took it to a place that made you want a shower.


Third runner-up

Xavier and Mystique Made a Baby. (14 points, 3 first place votes)

The origin of the Future Brotherhood character, Xavier is… that he’s the bastard son of Professor X and Mystique, that she left to be adopted. And he has daddy issues as a result, and hates the kids he did raise, the X-Men.

The weird part of this, though, is that it means at some point in continuity, we’re not sure when (before AvX, at least), Mystique was knocked up by Professor X and spent nine months laid up somewhere popping out a kid (checking herself into a hospital as Moira Mactaggart, no less). I mean, when exactly could this have happened? How could Xavier have been unaware of what her intentions were?

It’s… a stretch. The only thing that makes sense to explain it is that Bendis felt like Jennifer Lawrence and James MacAvoy had some good chemistry in X-Men: First Class.

[worstblogever]

Second Runner-up

The Mystery Villain Under the Dome is… Dark Beast? WTF? (15 points, 2 first place votes)

Another Bendis plot twist that had people scratching their heads was the reveal of the mystery bubbleheaded villain that was, behind the scenes, corrupting S.H.I.E.L.D. from within to make Sentinels and hunt down the X-Men was… Dark Beast. A very thin, and terminally ill Dark Beast, who slipped out of his cell undetected and just started taking control of the Helicarrier for his own whims. Who had just enough time to be revealed to have orchestrated a plot that in no way fit his modus operandi before he died trying to execute a detonation sequence to kill the X-Men from beyond the grave (which also failed).

I mean… we didn’t even know Dark Beast was sick. Maybe something was wrong that time he was taunting Wolverine and Gambit from a prison toilet? I dunno.


First Runner-up…

Dazzler’s EDGY Makeover!(23 points, 4 first place votes)

I’m actually surprised this got as many votes as it did. I mean… I wouldn’t even say this is the worst look I’ve ever seen on Dazzler (her New Excalibur look was pretty heinous). Her motivations for chopping her hair off and going all dark include being tortured and held to be used for harvesting Mutant Growth Hormone by Mystique. So maybe that could push her to adopt a new, darker, more vengeful persona?

Eh. Dazzler fans have spoken. I know better than to disagree.


And the 2014 winner of the “Rouge Mort” trophy…


Exodus is a SHIELD Operative! Oh. Wait, nevermind, he’s dead! (24 points, 4 first place votes)

Our fourth Bendis plot point in a row in this category, this one was another whiplash head-turner. Long time fanatic and mutant extremist was last seen in SHIELD custody, and upon Matthew Malloy turning up and blowing up half of South Carolina, Maria Hill put in a phone call to bring the best psychic SHIELD had on hand to come in and see what they could do to engage the threat.

And in walks Exodus, who is, yes, powerful as f***. But he’s never played ball with authorities. EVER. So to see him marching in like he’s got the worst case of Stockholm Syndrome ever to do the bidding of an ordinary human without trying to telekinetically crash the whole Helicarrier or telepathically make heads explode and just walk out of the joint is completely puzzling, from a motivation standpoint.

The fact that he gets his ass handed to him within 30 seconds by Malloy is another disappointing part of this. And it makes it the 2014 Rouge Mort Award winner.

[worstblogever]

MOST SHOCKING MOMENT OF 2014

Last year’s winner was “Guido Kills Tier!”… now for this year’s winners…


Honorable Mention

Inverted Evan is… APOCALYPSE! (10 points, 0 first place vote)

It makes sense, really. But still, when you see what you’ve come to know is a sweet skinny little kid version of En Sabah Nur and he rolls out decked out in full Apocalypse armor like a ‘Roidy McGoo, it’s enough to make you pee your pants in terror a little at the thought of the ass-kickings he’s about to dish out.


Honorable Mention

Fantomex kills Cable! (10 points, 2 first place vote)

X-Force (vol. 4) #7 opened up with their aquatic base having sharks circling around it in the water, and in the back of your mind, you had to wonder what they were there for. By the end of the issue, you found out when Fantomex executed one of Cable’s one-day-only clones by shooting him in the skull, and then casually fed the fish.
At least it answered the shark question.


Third runner-up

Exodus gets Worfed! (11 points, 3 first place votes)

Once upon a time, Exodus was established to be powerful enough to keep the entire X-Men and Avengers at bay, solo. So seeing him get kakked so easily by Matthew Malloy was supposed to establish how godlike powerful the new guy was. It still was disgusting of a plot device used to serve that purpose, to an extent that it shocked people who couldn’t believe how casually a major X-Men villain got a dirt nap.

[worstblogever]

Second Runner-up


Eva Bell’s Future Family (19 points, 3 first place votes)

Establishing what happened to Eva Bell during the new school X-Men’s trip to Tabula Rasa had some revelations that were both sad, and heavy enough in their impact that it got the bronze medal in the “Most Shocking Moment” category. Finding out she had a family that she accidentally wrote out of the timeline… man, that’s got to be a lot for a girl to deal with.


First Runner-up…


Lensherr Family Retcon!(25 points, 8 first place votes)

A seemingly throwaway line during AXIS that people couldn’t believe happened. After 30 years of it being canon that the Maximoff twins were the children of Magneto… it was just abruptly cast aside in a moment where the inverted Scarlet Witch cast a spell to harm those of her blood and only Quicksilver, but not Magneto was affected.

We’ll be discussing this moment again soon enough in this year’s awards, rest assured.


And the 2014 winner of the “Most Shocking Moment” trophy is…


Xavier and Mystique were Married! (31 points, 6 first place votes)
One of the two revelations of “The Last Will and Testament of Charles Xavier” was that he apparently married Raven Darkholme years ago. Why he never mentioned this to Mystique whenever they crossed paths, to anyone he knew in the X-Men trying to romance her (like Forge or Iceman) or to her children, Rogue and Nightcrawler, is a mystery enough.

Maybe he should have mentioned it to the Shi’ar before they made him the consort of Lilandra? Or to Moira Mactaggart? Or…

Hell, the implications of this random twist to try and help justify the existence of a bastard kid of Xavier’s on the Future Brotherhood just never stop. And that’s part of the reason it’s shocking… it just doesn’t make sense (see the Rouge Mort Award results). But shocking is shocking, and it was the moment that fans voted as the Most Shocking of 2014.

[worstblogever]

Honorable Mention

Psylocke Censors Marrow! (10 points, 2 first place votes)

Teammate rivalries are often a strong candidate to win in the “Funniest Moment” category, and Psylocke telepathically forcing Marrow to utter gibberish rather than swear was a moment that cracked up enough people to earn it “Honorable Mention” in 2014.

Now if only Betsy could get her to use a word other than “spleen”.


Honorable Mention

Emma Frost’s Psychic Battle with Teen Jean! (10 points, 3 first place votes)

There were a lot of things about this psychic duel from All New X-Men #30 that were hysterical. The whole fight started like it was Emma Frost going the Tyler Durden from Fight Club approach to giving Jean lessons. Then there was the fact that Teen Jean found out that Cyclops will have a telepathic affair with Emma down the line. But the exchanges between the New Xavier School kids and the Stepford Cuckoos during the fight, as well as its outcome, really are the deciding factors, I think.


Third runner-up…

Forgetmenot, the Phantom Houseguest! (11 points, 3 first place votes)

X-Force has had an unseen ally for many months in their battle against Volga, and it has been Forgetmenot, a character established in X-Men: Legacy #300 whose power is that once he’s out of sight, he’s out of mind. Like literally. Nobody usually perceives he even exists, and when he concentrates to “appear” to someone, the minute he’s more than ten feet away, they forget he was ever there, or that they met him.

So how did X-Force realize he was ever even there? The toilet paper inventories didn’t match the output, apparently.

[worstblogever]

Second Runner-up…

Beast Frets that ‘Cyclops is Right’! (15 points, 3 first place votes)

If there’s one thing that amuses X-Men fans these days, it’s when Beast is frustrated and admits he’s wrong. So… yeah.



First Runner-up…

Danger hits on Everything!(20 points, 5 first place votes)

Over the course of the past calendar year, Danger tried to seduce Gambit, Warlock, Polaris, the Scarlet Witch, and Cypher (succeeded on that last one). Lorna nearly inhaled her coffee when it happened, but a drunken Wanda Maximoff took it in stride (then again, she was once married to a robot, and is insane, so maybe she’s a tad more jaded).

In any event, Danger seems to have rebounded from her previous relationship with Madison Jeffries quite nicely.


And the winner of the “Funniest Moment of 2014” is…

Emma Frost Reacts to the Xavier/Darkholme Marriage! (24 points, 6 first place votes)

Emma Frost was kind enough to say what we were all thinking when the big revelation from “The Last Will and Testament of Charles Xavier” was unveiled. And that snagged her a big win in the “Funniest Moment” category. Heck, she fared better than a lot of the "comic relief" characters for getting laughs in 2014. Sure, maybe this wasn’t the White Queen’s most poignant year in X-Men history, but at least she’s provided us with some chuckles, right?

[worstblogever]

BEST FIGHT/BATTLE OF 2014

Last year’s award winner was the Phoenix-empowered Emma Frost emasculating Thor. What took home the prize this year?



Honorable Mention

Polaris, Gambit, & Quicksilver vs. Danger! (12 points, 2 first place votes)

The first arc of All New X-Factor ended in a pitched battle between new Serval Industries employees Lorna Dane, Remy LeBeau, Pietro Maximoff, and their one-time ally, Danger on the mysterious Thieves’ Guild island in the Mediterranean. After some vulgar displays of power by its participants, the whole thing was ended in the most dramatic of ways… with a lip lock by Gambit upon the gymnasium with pretentions.


Honorable Mention

All New X-Factor vs. Sunfire & Longshot! (12 points, 2 first place votes)

A second consecutive fight scripted by PAD within All New X-Factor, bringing in the amped-up version of Sunfire and Longshot to square off against all of X-Factor while affected by AXIS-inverted telepaths inside of Serval Industries with a “nuclear football” serving as the prize for the winner was a nice little tie-in to the AXIS event. Really, it may have been the best AXIS story I read (although that might not be saying much).


Third runner-up

X-Force vs. MI13 & the Pheasant Pluckers! (13 points, 3 first place vote)

Since the cancellation of Captain Britain and MI:13, when Pete Wisdom and his team have guest-starred, it’s usually been a great read. The writer who seems to bring in the British superhero team off the bench the most is Simon Spurrier, who previously did so in X-Men: Legacy (vol. 2) last year. This time out, he had Pete Wisdom, Meggan, and Faiza Hussein face off against the new X-Force team in the Middle East during the War on Terror, and gave them a few allies from British Special Forces to further even the odds.

[worstblogever]

Second runner-up

New Xavier School vs. Future Brotherhood, ROUND TWO! (15 points, 3 first place vote)


This fight got off to a great start, with Raze posing as Teen Cyclops and burying his claws in X-23’s gut, leaving her for dead in the Canadian wilderness. From there, it got even better as Xavier Jr. started to psychically lay a beating on Emma Frost, the Cuckoos, and Jean Grey for a time, before they mounted an epic comeback and rallied against their foes in the middle of their new home, with X-23 rallying the team.


First runner-up

Magneto & Uncanny Avengers vs. Red Skull & the S-Men! (16 points, 3 first place vote)

This fight… Hoo boy. I loved it. Seeing Magneto finally get sick of the Red Skull’s trolling and stop pulling punches was actually the best thing about AXIS. He turned all of the S-Men into something you could fit in a jello-glass before bashing in the Red Skull’s head like it was a piñata filled with candy.

And sure, that’s what the Red Skull wanted so he could become the Red Onslaught, but I don’t care. Whenever a super-Nazi has his brains wiped all over the pavement, I consider it a highlight.

And the winner of the “Best Battle of 2014” is…

Hijack & the X-Men vs. Dark Beast & S.H.I.E.L.D.! (25 points, 5 first place vote)
Brian Michael Bendis’ Uncanny X-Men (vol. 3) was building to this moment for 22 issues, and when you finally saw the mystery villain make his move and unleash Sentinels on the Jean Grey School for Higher Learning, and the new character Hijack have to lead the vanguard against S.H.I.E.L.D.’s fascist dumb-assery, gorgeously penciled by Chris Bachalo… you knew it was going to get some recognition. It was the winner in this category, rather easily.