Traitor Game L: Existential Crisis

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:14 PM

Jeremi 06-14-2007 03:30 PM

Seeing Batman body or what was left of it Havik could only smile. “A most interesting killing method I commend the traitors in their way of chaos.”

Gan Ning had stopped drinking and had also walked up to the remains of Batman. “Oh boy that’s a way to go! These traitors sure are a twisted bunch.” Gan Ning noticing Bob & Karl’s predicament decided to talk to them. “So you two are also together as a team huh? Me and skull face…” “I heard that!” “…were supposed to be single competitors in this Traitor Game but were ordered to become a team by something called a Plot God. Are you two in a same kind of predicament?” Then Gan Ning noticed what Bob was watching. “Well what do we have here? Some adultered fun? Give me some room!" Gan Ning sat down next to Bob “That’s some hot babes…oh and I forgot to ask what your names are.”

Eternal Torment 06-14-2007 04:41 PM

"So...Dwight's sheets were stuffed into Batman's mouth, which served to kill him." Apocalypse mused. The stream of memories was almost constant now. It was starting to affect the way he thought.

darkkeeperjr 06-14-2007 04:56 PM

Double post

pan and bling looked around the room for something else to do.
(sigh)

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:16 PM

The Purple Skull 06-14-2007 06:05 PM

Originally Posted by Jeremi

Seeing Batman body or what was left of it Havik could only smile. “A most interesting killing method I commend the traitors in their way of chaos.”

Gan Ning had stopped drinking and had also walked up to the remains of Batman. “Oh boy that’s a way to go! These traitors sure are a twisted bunch.” Gan Ning noticing Bob & Karl’s predicament decided to talk to them. “So you two are also together as a team huh? Me and skull face…” “I heard that!” “…were supposed to be single competitors in this Traitor Game but were ordered to become a team by something called a Plot God. Are you two in a same kind of predicament?” Then Gan Ning noticed what Bob was watching. “Well what do we have here? Some adultered fun? Give me some room!" Gan Ning sat down next to Bob “That’s some hot babes…oh and I forgot to ask what your names are.”

"Well I am Bob: Agent of Hydra! This here is my best friend---"

"I'm not your best friend."

"THIS HERE IS MY BEST FRIEND, Karl: Engineer of AIM!"

"And for some strange, sick, twisted reason, Bob and myself cannot stray too far away from each other."

"That's cuz we were destined to be best friends!"

"I wish you'd stop saying that. Listen, it might be good for the four of us to hang around for a bit. I know it probably won't be a good idea considering that any of us might be one Hela's agents, but sometimes you just gotta take chances. You know?"

"Plus we have porn. Sweet merciful porn. Plus this mystery disc that Thorpool sold me. I won---"

"Enough with that already! Look we gotta make our vote soon. I'm going back to the computer. You just don't do anything stupid. Please."

"Aye Aye Karl."

Karl then heads off to the nearest disc player to watch the mystery disc.

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:20 PM

Weirdopky 06-14-2007 06:28 PM

Originally Posted by Froggy

"YOu shouldn't assume such things... you seemed awfully quick to jump on me Santa with these accusations of yours, is there a underlying motive to this verbal assault?" Megaman asked Mr Claus

Underlying motive, you twit? Come on, stop fooling around kid. You're not a damn baby, and you're not with this Dr. guy you keep talking about. This is a traitor game. If anyone knows anything about it, it's me. If you're hiding something, you could easily be one of them. Still, I haven't directly pointed a finger, I just want the facts. So, Megaman, what's with the secrets?

Originally Posted by mrcelophane

Whoaaaa, theres someone dead!? I don't wanna get involved with youse people so ill be making my exit right about now unless someone tells me what the hell is goin on and why I should stay

Calm yourself, Mr. Stallone. I mean, Mr. Balboa. We're in what's known as a traitor game. We've all been sent here to help good ol' Odin the Allfather to stop HELA's agents from killing us, and damning us to her domicile. Now, if you would, try to gather clues and guess who might have killed batman and made him into a twinkie.

Crimson King 06-14-2007 06:43 PM

Hotaru looked around. After listening to the various arguments for a while, he said," So, is this the part where we start blaming each other for Batman's disappearance?

tangentman 06-14-2007 06:47 PM

Tara earnestly shook her head. "No, there doesn't have to be blaming. We can be rational about this and look at the evidence." With a beseeching look in her eyes, the witch looked around the room. "Right?"

Next, Tara looked at the remaining "Twinkies" packets with a grimace. "We know that whoever killed Batman had to be good with the Kung Fu. The killer also likes to get all hack-and-slashy. Then, there's, well, the tests." She tentatively pointed toward what was left of Batman's mouth. "In his, um, mouth."

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:22 PM

Superheroic 06-14-2007 07:01 PM

Originally Posted by Loki

"Well, look who's the big man on campus now? Picking fights with my Thor, acting all begrudging and disdainful?"

"I'll bet YOU killed Batman. Too much testosterone? Not enough fighting for your likes? Defend against this claim, thou must, ARES!"

Ares eyed Loki. He could feel the Violence well up within himself. "I find it ironic that the God of Lies and Mischief is here to uncover the truth of who Hela's Agents may be. But so be it. If Odin is allowing this travesty to take place then far be it from me to question it."

"You accuse me of killing Batman? Of being a Traitor? I have slain greater beings then yourself for much less affronts. Nevertheless, I am no Agent of Hela. I have turned my back upon my Pantheon, on all Pantheons. My only wish is to raise my son, Alex, without their interference. I am only here as the Fates threat--er--entreated me to help Odin save Valhalla. I had no option, the same as everyone here, but to comply to the will of the Norns."

Superheroic 06-14-2007 07:08 PM

Originally Posted by Tara

"We know that whoever killed Batman had to be good with the Kung Fu. The killer also likes to get all hack-and-slashy. Then, there's, well, the tests." She tentatively pointed toward what was left of Batman's mouth. "In his, um, mouth."

"Yes, Little Witch," Ares turned to Tara. "It seems the Traitors have tried very hard to frame Schrute. Of course, Schrute seems to be very clever. Perhaps he has killed Batman hoping the overwhelming obvious evidence pointing to him will preclude us for voting for him."

Ares finally noticed Balder the Brave's dead body, "Plus we have another menace looming on the horizon. Hopefully it's one I can kill!"

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:25 PM

The Purple Skull 06-14-2007 07:19 PM

When we last off, our dynamic duo went about their own personal business (though not too far away from each other). Karl went back to using one of the Asgardian computers in hopes of finding information on the players of this game. Bob, on the other hand, has decided to go against Thorpool's wishes and watch the mystery disc right this very instant.

"There has to be something here I can find that will help me along in this game."

"There has to be some juicy stuff in this disc if Thorpool didn't want me to watch it right away."

Suddenly, both Bob & Karl find what they are looking for.

"Hello. What do we have here? All the information on this edition's traitor game. I've done it! In a few short minutes, I will have access to every single facet of this game. AIM IS AWESOME! Oh jeez I hope Bob didn't hear that."

"Hello. What do we have here? OH MY F$^%$ GOD! It's MODOK...and Strucker! Doing some godforsaken stuff to each other. Eww. I mean, this is my ticket! With this little disc Hydra could be mine! Bob: Supreme Commander of Hydra! No screw that. Bob: King of the World! I like that! I like that alot! I have to show this to Karl! HAIL HYDRA~!"

Bob begins running frantically.

"30 more seconds. I can't wait!"

What Bob failed to realize was, he ran the wrong direction and strayed too far from Karl. This causes him to be magically transported back to Karl. As he is zapped back, he crashes right into Karl breaking both the disc and the computer.

"NO! NO! This is not happening! 5 more seconds! Noooo!"

"NO! NO! This is not happening! The world could have been mine! Noooo!"

"Dammit Bob! Why?! Why?! I had the info we needed in the tip of my hands. And as usual, Mr. Agent of Hydra had to go mess it up!"

"But Karl, I had some---"

"I don't care! I just don't care! Now listen here. I've had enough of your antics! I'm going to the next computer and try and salvage whatever I lost. You sit here and don't say ANOTHER word! No more crazy schemes! No nothing!"

"But--"

"But nothing! I mean it!"

(In a low, sad tone) "I understand."

Live Studio Audience: "Awwwwww"

"Oh whatever!"

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:30 PM

Deadpooligan 06-14-2007 07:33 PM

Originally Posted by Superheroic

Ares eyed Loki. He could feel the Violence well up within himself. "I find it ironic that the God of Lies and Mischief is here to uncover the truth of who Hela's Agents may be. But so be it. If Odin is allowing this travesty to take place then far be it from me to question it."

"You accuse me of killing Batman? Of being a Traitor? I have slain greater beings then yourself for much less affronts. Nevertheless, I am no Agent of Hela. I have turned my back upon my Pantheon, on all Pantheons. My only wish is to raise my son, Alex, without their interference. I am only here as the Fates threat--er--entreated me to help Odin save Valhalla. I had no option, the same as everyone here, but to comply to the will of the Norns."

"Jeeze, Ares. I thought you were the God of War and not the God of Whine. (And don't make a homonym quip about Dionysus because I saw it coming)."

Loki grinned and crossed his arms.

"We're not so different, Ares. We both have annoying brothers who take our fathers' attention and love from us. It causes us to rebel, to act out in a flurry of emotions."

He thought a little more about the comparisons between them.

"Not only that, but Thor has bested us both on a few occasions, and we have both fought entire teams of self-proclaimed "heroes" singlehandedly."

He was about to say something else, but noticed Balder's dead body.

"For someone so Brave, my dear brother Balder sure does kick the proverbial bucket often."

Everyone stared at him.

"I'm not even physically here right now. Besides, Hod probably did it. He's had it out for him forever."

His eyes glazed over. Loki realized this was the first act towards Ragnarok.

"I... have to go... prepare..."

And with that, his image faded fast.

OOC: Don't let this stop you from responding Superheroic. He'll teleport after you reply.

@ Purple Skull: HILARIOUS.

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:33 PM

Tommy 06-14-2007 07:37 PM

Originally Posted by The Purple Skull

Live Studio Audience: "Awwwwww"

OOC: The Audience from the last Traitor Game perhaps?

Deadpooligan 06-14-2007 07:38 PM

Originally Posted by The Purple Skull

Live Studio Audience: "Awwwwww"

"Oh whatever!"

"Lo', the audience can sympathizeth with you two dopes, yet they don't shed a laugh or scream for me?"

Thorpool shook his fist to the... audience...?

"By dad's unkempt beard, YOU WILL REACT TO ME!!"

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:34 PM

Donald M. 06-14-2007 07:38 PM

Dwight staggered to his feet, unsteady but clearly much recovered from his initial shock over George Clooney's gruesome murder.

"The shredder, the questionnaires, clearly Clooney's killers sought to point the blame at me, but they did a clumsy job of it.

"There's no sense in pointing out that I was fight Megaman at the time of the killing, there are three traitors after all and I could have masterminded the kill without being directly involved, using the fight to distract the other players.

"I'm certainly capable of dreaming up such a plot, but I didn't. I wasn't involved but I think I know who was. I'm not stupid Loki, I saw you having your little shapeshifting fun. I always suspected Jim was an agent of yours and you confirmed that. Another here is also your agent, therefore I accuse Thorpool of being one of Hela's minions in this game!"

Dwight sat at the desk, clearly impressed with his own deductive skill. He scowled in disgust at the gore-covered paper shredder, picked it up, and tossed it away.

It was then he noticed that one of the bobble heads, Clooney-as-Batman, had transformed into a model depicting a pile of Twinkies, some of which were leaking a chunky red substance.

"Huh. That's interesting."

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:35 PM

Deadpooligan 06-14-2007 07:44 PM

Originally Posted by Donald M.

"I'm certainly capable of dreaming up such a plot, but I didn't. I wasn't involved but I think I know who was. I'm not stupid Loki, I saw you having your little shapeshifting fun. I always suspected Jim was an agent of yours and you confirmed that. Another here is also your agent, therefore I accuse Thorpool of being one of Hela's minions in this game!"

"I thinketh thou dost not 'get it'. Loki is Jim. You have a Norse God acting as your everyday annoyance! Thou should'st be proud!"

Thorpool laughed triumphantly.

"And please, if I were'st going to murdereth someone, I'd verily useth a gun!"

He waited for a reaction.

"Just kidding! Only lame, weak, and dumb Gods useth guns these days! With superbly-amped attributes, we haveth no need for bullets! Tis common sense, duh-eth!"

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:39 PM

Indigo Al 06-14-2007 07:46 PM

OOC: Coming up shortly ..... Thursday Night Fight!

Donald M. 06-14-2007 07:52 PM

Originally Posted by Deadpooligan

"I thinketh thou dost not 'get it'. Loki is Jim. You have a Norse God acting as your everyday annoyance! Thou should'st be proud!"

Thorpool laughed triumphantly.

"Proud? I guess . . ."

Dwight looked at Loki.

"Is your immortal existence really that empty? This is a game of unique firsts for me: I've fought a robot, now I feel genuine pity for a god."

"And please, if I were'st going to murdereth someone, I'd verily useth a gun!"

He waited for a reaction.

"Just kidding! Only lame, weak, and dumb Gods useth guns these days! With superbly-amped attributes, we haveth no need for bullets! Tis common sense, duh-eth!"

"Not much of a denial," said Dwight, "I'm confident in my vote."

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:46 PM

Indigo Al 06-14-2007 07:59 PM

Thursday Night Fight!

The argument over Batman's murderer raged in the Player's Tavern.

All of a sudden, a large thundering crash and explosion startled everyone, and knocked them to the floor!

When the dust cleared, everyone saw the shape of a massive mobile trailer home. Then they heard a shrill, elderly woman's voice over the chaos:

"GIT THEM AZZ-GARD'UNS, BOYS! THEY GOT A HOSTESS MACHINE IN THAR!!!!"

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:49 PM

Deadpooligan 06-14-2007 08:00 PM

Originally Posted by Donald M.

"Proud? I guess . . ."

Dwight looked at Loki.

"Is your immortal existence really that empty? This is a game of unique firsts for me: I've fought a robot, now I feel genuine pity for a god."

"Not much of a denial," said Dwight, "I'm confident in my vote."

"Hey, hey! Don't dis mine father! He mayhap gets tired from failed attempts at conquering Asgard and thus chooses smaller, funnier, highly praised by a cult following, and Emmy winning goals. Besides, it's not like thou art the only one he picks on..."

Thorpool laughed again.

"Accusing me of murder tis like saying to thyself 'I wilst never gain a bedmate'; tis obvious and everyone hath thought it already."

Thorpool glanced at Thor popping in with a buncha' Rednecks.

"Ha! Look at old Thor; tis verily lame despite the power of the fruit pie!"

The Asgardians responded confusingly.

"What?"
"Old Thor's not here..."
"Thor tis lame though..."
"Aye!"
"Old Thor tis the lamest thing I doth ever seen, verily!"

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:53 PM

tangentman 06-14-2007 08:02 PM

Tara sighed over the divisiveness already in motion. "I think this is exactly what we need to avoid. The bickering will only leave us wide open for Hela's minions to pick off." Then, she meekly raised her hand to get Odin's attention. "Um, Odin? Sir? What are the rules about detective work? Are there any rules about what we can or can't do to find the killers?"

Before she received an answer, though, Tara heard the din raised by the Ding-A-Lings. Tara did a double-take at the cosmic bucolics. "Oh my god. Are those really--Hillbillies in Space?"

Indigo Al 06-14-2007 08:02 PM

OOC: You may assume that the Ding-A-Ling family has been enhanced with cosmic strength and endurance due to their interdimensional voyages in their trailer home!

You may also assume any number of Ding-a-ling clan members - they no doubt have a very interesting and convoluted family tree.....

Now kick some ass.

Indigo Al 06-14-2007 08:14 PM

Originally Posted by Deadpooligan

Thorpool glanced at Thor popping in with a buncha' Rednecks.

OOC: Just FYI - Thor is not officially in this - I posted the Ding A Ling cartoon for reference.

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:57 PM

Deadpooligan 06-14-2007 08:16 PM

Originally Posted by Indigo Al

OOC: Just FYI - Thor is not officially in this - I posted the Ding A Ling cartoon for reference.

OOC: I'll turn it into a 4th wall break.

Indigo Al 06-14-2007 08:18 PM

Originally Posted by Deadpooligan

OOC: I'll turn it into a 4th wall break.

OOC: No worries, I'm not a stickler for that sort of thing.

Froggy 06-14-2007 08:27 PM

"There's really nothing else to say sir, I have a suspicion I just dont know whether to act on it or not is all" Megaman replied calmly. "I have no secrets, you can ask me anything, I will tell you truthfully"

edit: my bad superheroic

**Chris Lang** · 03-10-2016, 01:58 PM

darkkeeperjr 06-14-2007 08:29 PM

Pan and bling jumped up as one. Both flew up to the sky/ceiling and came down like a shaft of light. Pan pulled two enchanted twins dagger from his pockets and went low. he cut the belts of four Ding a ling men before he pulled up.

"Ho Ho! Fair warning! Hold your pants up cause I'm gonna cut the first Ding A Ling I see!"

Bling flew around and stabbed the noses of Dings as she spat in their ears.

Thread: Traitor Game L: Existential Crisis

Thread Tools

Display

Posting Permissions