Thing is, though, this wasn't a preliminary discussion. Marvel had already decided to do a solo book about a gay character discovering his gay identity written by a gay man best known for doing autobio comics about his gay self. Gayness - specifically Bobby's journey of self-discovery - was the hook! To then go "but don't make it too gay!" means someone was numb from the neck up.
And the book sold despite that! It just found its audience outside of the DM.