there IS someone out there for EVERYONE.
and it doesn't happen very often in a club/bar anyways. . . go, join a club, or an online community with a local presence where folks have similar interests.
go to the local Barnes & Noble (or whatever book store is still around by you), and join a book club?
Go to the local coffee shop, and look to see what's posted (most local coffee shops, have a board that advertises groups to meet and socialize with).
and no, I'm not talking SPECIFICALLY gay groups. . just join a group that has something you are interested in, and you'll make friends. (and you would be shocked how often a friendship turns to something more, or a friend wants to set you up with someone).
just bottom line? get out there and socialize