Welcome to Bite Club: Luis Suarez vs Mike Tyson

[Laevatein]

These two fight, but may only attack each other by biting.

Referee: Dr. Hannibal Lecter

[Matt the Manly]

Lol current suarez beats current Tyson
Peak Tyson is going to chew his teeth off

[big_adventure]

Lol current suarez beats current Tyson
Peak Tyson is going to chew his teeth off

How would current Suarez beat current Tyson? Mike is twice the size of the guy, still in pretty good shape, and it's not like one forgets how to grab onto a whiny little football bitch and pin him down for a buffet. Suarez could, what, run away?

[Mari]

How would current Suarez beat current Tyson? Mike is twice the size of the guy, still in pretty good shape, and it's not like one forgets how to grab onto a whiny little football bitch and pin him down for a buffet. Suarez could, what, run away?

Suarez is taller than Tyson. But Tyson is much bigger.

If speed is a deciding factor El Pistolero (or El Bitolero!) wins!

Though I'm unsure of the rules... they can not use arms to aid in attack?

[Laevatein]

Suarez is taller than Tyson. But Tyson is much bigger.

If speed is a deciding factor El Pistolero (or El Bitolero!) wins!

Though I'm unsure of the rules... they can not use arms to aid in attack?

You can use hands to hold onto your opponent, but not for striking.

[big_adventure]

You can use hands to hold onto your opponent, but not for striking.

So Tyson being three times as strong and a trained fighter makes up, massively, for the age difference.

[Hiromi]

I know Suarez has been CAUGHT biting three times, but has he ever taken a body part off? Because Tyson completely severed half of Holyfield's ear.

[Matt the Manly]

How would current Suarez beat current Tyson? Mike is twice the size of the guy, still in pretty good shape, and it's not like one forgets how to grab onto a whiny little football bitch and pin him down for a buffet. Suarez could, what, run away?

Yeah he could run away. And tire out Tyson. Suarez is a professional athlete at peak fitness. His size should actually help here when hes nipping for quick munches. He should win on points provided he is not pinned down . Which he could well be, considering Tyson's training.

Plus have you seen the size of his choppers? Tyson's gonna have a hard time overcoming that handicap with his regular size molars....

[Matt the Manly]

I know Suarez has been CAUGHT biting three times, but has he ever taken a body part off? Because Tyson completely severed half of Holyfield's ear.

He hasn't because , you know, thats illegal in football. Or boxing. Or any sport really.

Suraez's excuse for his latest offence was " I didn't do it! Swear!The other guy fell on my teeth!"
Well it didn't work out well for him or his team. Bannef for 30 matches. Team is out of the World Cup without him

[Mari]

You can use hands to hold onto your opponent, but not for striking.

Then I think Tyson would defeat Suarez.

[big_adventure]

Tyson is listed at 1m78, and was measured a couple of times a year on live TV to prove this.

Suarez is listed at 1m81, and athletes in sports where they are not publicly measured are notorious for, hmm, exaggerating, about their height.

So at most, there is a 3cm difference, and in reality, there probably isn't even that.

In addition, Tyson had a (again, quite proven) 72" reach. Average people have a reach roughly equal with their height. So, absent other information, Tyson and Suarez have similar reaches.

Suarez really has no advantage useful in the scenario against Tyson, and Tyson has MASSIVE advantages against Suarez.