None of that contradicts the retcon though. In fact, it only makes it more interesting and shows she was already evaluating Peter on his own terms and separate from the public image of Spider-Man, despite having the knowledge that they were the one and the same.
Okay maybe "Peter get back before he misses all the fun", but knowing her, she could be using "fun" to refer to herself and the date.
Like I said, if you are onboard, it is easy to come up with in character reasons for most of her out of continuity behaviour.